No, “Correct-a-phobia” is not a dictionary word nor a term in Psychology. It is a term that I have invented to describe the condition of a particular kind of person. One who has a fear of being corrected because of what they perceive as demeaning consequences that go along with being corrected.
Some people, who have a problem excepting correction or being proven incorrect, often view the one correcting them as the enemy and their correction as a put down or an attempt to prove them ignorant or dumb.
Where did this obsession with being “agreed with” come from? It could come from many sources. It could result from getting away with making people agree with them when they were growing up by threatening to cut off friendships, not giving something needed or wanted, or even threatening with physical violence, (once they learned that they could manipulate people that way). If this happens often enough while growing up there is a tendency to depend on it as a source of empowerment and to use it to pacify the need to feel smarter or more intelligent and more important than some one else. And when ever they are not given that kind of control they feel rejected or belittled.
Many people who were on their own at an early age often suffer this kind of condition because they are so used to having their way and doing what they want to do. Depending on the depth of their condition, these people can be difficult to teach and usually end up having to teach themselves most of what they know (often with much error). Then they attempt to pass that false information on to others as authoritative truth, and they defy attempts to point out the error of their view, often accusing the corrector of arrogance for not agreeing with them.
A wife who suffers from this condition will bring chaos to her home by demanding that she have her way. She will insist that her husband agree with her point of view and she will accuse him of being un-loving if he fails to cater to her erroneous opinions.
Any disagreement on his part is viewed as a put down or an attack on her intelligence.
If she is a professing Christian, she will insist that he lead verbally, while in the same breath contend with his every decision. She will then proceed to make the decision and take the action and then accuse him of being lazy, weak and unassertive. She will give other men more respect then she gives her own husband and will often put on her most pleasant act in their company to give the impression that she is always a delightful person at home.
She will see her husband’s objection to her dominating manner as a challenge to her “authority” and she will use other men to humiliate him by comparing them to him in their conversations.
If she is not saved, she may find the company of “other men”, (who don’t challenge her authority because they are trying to get next to her), more pleasant then her own husband who must be honest with her because he has been given a charge by God to be her head, also because he has to live with her and cannot endure for long such “control”.
A husband who suffers from this condition will also bring chaos to his home by insisting that he has his way. He will become violent in order to instill fear in his wife and he will use that fear to get his way.
He will not tolerate insubordination of any kind and will threaten his wife with bodily harm for anything that he perceives to be rebellion against his “authority”.
If he is a professing Christian, he may forbid her to associate with other Christians and worn her not to talk about their personal life to others, not even to church leadership for help.
He might stalk her and keep tabs on everywhere she goes, concerned that she might attempt to leave him or expose his hypocrisy to the saints.
The above examples are of course extreme cases, and there are a variety of others from one extreme to another, but there are many people who suffer such relationships. There are those who suffer from a milder type of “Correct-a-phobia” who nonetheless put their loved ones trough a great deal of stress. Because when someone views corrections as put down or an attack on their intelligence, they often become difficult to teach and often cause those who would teach them to avoid doings so for fear of offending them or being misunderstood or and being dragged into a verbal conflict.
There is no shame in having to be corrected, and to be able to except correction gracefully is a sign of maturity. And even more importantly it is a biblical mandate.
The inability to except correction is a sign of insecurity and immaturity.
As believers our goal should always be to grow spiritually. And to grow we must understand that correction plays an important part in our proper development.
The following scriptures speak directly to this point:
Prov:15:10: Correction is grievous unto him that forsakes the way: and he that hates reproof shall die.
Prov:10:17: He is in the way of life that keeps instruction: but he that refuses reproof errors.
Prov:12:1: Whoso loveth instruction loveth knowledge: but he that hates reproof is brutish.
Prov:15:32: He that refuses instruction despises his own soul: but he that hears reproof gets understanding.
Please understand, what I have discussed above is not the “problem critics” who suffers from the
illusion that they are Gods give of all knowledge to the world. I realize that there are indeed some
people who thrive on feeling superior to others and who seek out every opportunity to belittle
others by correcting them. This kind of person generally possesses high academic credentials, but
they are also found among the lesser educated. And indeed, they can be a problem as well. But that is a discussion for another time.
What I have dealt with here is a person that we have to deal with more commonly because there are far more of them in our every day life. At home, at work, at school and yes even at church.
But even more commonly such people are found on social media, where they live to express themselves and ironically, where they must from time to time deal with correction.
Because some people have an obsession with needing approval, usually due to something they suffered in their youth and or home life growing up, they become depressed or angry when others do not agree with them. I have had many dialogues with such people and it is an exhausting experience. But experience has taught me much about how to deal with such people and so it was not a waist of time.
Such people should know that the first steps in overcoming this condition, whatever the cause, is an honest acknowledgement that the problem exists, and a sincere determination to overcome it.
As stated in Proverbs”
He that covers his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesses and forsakes them shall have mercy. (Proverbs 28:13)
Disagreement is not a put down, in fact, it is an important opportunity that forces us to carefully reevaluate our convictions and then present an intelligent case to prove our conclusions if we are sure we are correct.
Should our efforts to convince another person that we are correct fail, we should be willing to accept that and move on, without being obsessive about the disagreement.
More importantly, we should never be so obsessed with being approved of or agreed with, that we refuse to acknowledge when we are wrong. This attitude is most unhealthy and can lead to all kinds of problems.
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 This is easy for her to do with others as long as they do not challenge her opinions.