Even if you are not a Christian, you comments are welcome, would be just as happy to get your feedback as well.
WIVES SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBANDS
Before I begin I would like you to read the following verses as foundation for what I am about to say.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Ephesians 5:22
Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands
in every thing. Ephesians 5:24
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Colossians 3:18
To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands,
that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:5
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word,
they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
1 Peter 3:1
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 1 Peter 3:5
And finally, though it may seem to be unrelated, I assure you that it is.
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith:
these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.
THE BIBLE OR MODERN SOCIETY
It seems that much of the importance of the biblical order within marriage has been lost or rather, abandoned these days by the local church, and it has been replaced by a kind of “psychology of marriage” that places feelings and “societal opinion” above God’s word. This has resulted in the misrepresentation of God and the church in our society.
The example of God as head of the church that is subject to Him, has been replace by a so called better “equal submission” and “equal authority” system in which the wife is an equal authority to her husband within the marriage structure.
This misrepresentation has not only dishonored God, but it has resulted in a much more difficult situation for the husbands to fulfill their role as head and leader within the marriage structure.
Many wives, emboldened by this new perspective have refused to allow their husbands to actually lead and have instead themselves dictated how things would be done, and when where and why as well. (Some, while claiming to want their husbands to take his place and lead).
They have defiantly proclaimed that they are just as capable of making the final decisions for their homes and thus are not required to allow their husbands to have the last word.
Much like Korah, Dathan and Abiram in Number 16, some wives take the attitude that their husbands are mistaken if they think they are the only ones qualified to lead and make the final decisions for their family. This attitude may even have been sparked by a decision that their husbands have made that they think was not wise, and so they feel it is time for them to take over, like Miriam and Arron in Numbers 21. But as you will recall, in both cases, it did not go well with those who opposed God’s order.
But this is something that such wives apparently have not taken into consideration.
(Some will even deny that there is any connection between the New Testament’s take on the marriage and what took place in Numbers 16 and 21).
Their often emotion-driven decisions has caused disaster in many homes and have driven many husbands away. Those who have chosen to remain have been forced to suffer the humiliating condition of functioning as a submitted husband or have in weakness, distanced themselves emotionally from their dominant wife out of frustration, not being allowed to function as a man in their home.
This humiliation is magnified when there are children involved, who are able to see their mother dominate their father or defy his instructions and requests in the home.
Since their “authority equality” with their husbands is so forcefully affirmed by those both within and out side of the church, many of these wives are unable to see the damage that their so called “liberation” have caused their marriage, and so they place the blame of their failed or failing marriage on their husbands unwillingness to “share” their authority equally, often accusing him of “not loving them”. Because in their understanding, love means “do what I say, when, where and how I say it, without complaint”.
There is a reason that the wives obligation to submit to their husbands is stated so many times in the New Testament.
It is stressed so often because of its very important role in the marriage relationship and its success. God wants the women to understand just how important her role as submitter is.
You will notice that I have highlighted key words in the marriage passages above. They emphasizes the reason that the woman’s submission is so important, though that point is often ignored by those who feel that biblical submission in marriage is an out dated relic of the past.
Never the less, biblical submission is still important, and our society has twisted that role to be something demeaning rather honorable. Atheists are fond of using the submission passages in the Bible as a moral hammer to beat Christians with. (Why Christians allow atheist to interpret their Bible for them is beyond me).
The submission of the wife to her husband is also stressed by God because God knew that human psychology would dominate over His word in society and that many of the churches would bow to these ideas. God wanted to leave them without an excuse for violating His instructions.
Women who profess a relationship with Jesus Christ, who claim to have been saved from their sins, should pay very close attention to the manner in which they execute God’s instructions.
They should realize that failing to submit to their husbands, is a direct violation of Gods word which carries consequences just as any violation of God’s word carries.
Any book written by a Christian author that claims that the husband is the one who is ultimately responsible for the success of the marriage is teaching a lie. In the marriage relationship BOTH people are equally accountable for the success of their marriage.
And any time either fails to fulfill what God requires of them; they contribute to the damage of their marriage.
While it is true that the husband is required to function as the head, there is no mandate or permission give to him in the Bible to take that leadership, it must be willingly given by the wife.
Now about Matthew 23:23, that is for any spouse who has the tendency to point out all of the “other things” that they do that is right. This is for you.
You see, the problem is not what you are doing right but what you are not doing, and what you are doing wrong. Jesus here is Matthew 23:23 makes it clear that you are not inoculated from your obligations by those things that you have done right, you are still obligated to do that which you have failed to do.
When we as Christians learn the lesson of accountability and began to dedicate ourselves to truly doing what God has instructed us to do, our marriages will be just fine, and the world will finally be able to see the God true purpose in marriage.